Well Done Fillet

Well Done Fillet

Waiter Stuff

I will let you down

my sort of Socialist Party

I have got no follow through. I get bored easily you see. I start things that I never complete. I've always been this way. As a child my bedroom was filled with half made Lego houses and Airfix models with no wings. The fact that WellDoneFillet is still going is just amazing to be honest. I really did expect to get bored with it after a few weeks. It wouldn't have surprised me if it had been dumped in the corner along with all the other things I couldn't be arsed with anymore. Things like:

  1. Socialism. I tried Socialism for about 7 or 8 weeks back in ought 3. It wasn't the socialism itself that bored me rigid but Socialists and specifically the Socialists from the Socialist Workers Party. Fuck me with a hardback edition of Das Kapital were those kids dull. Now the dullness I could actually deal with, dialectical theories aren't meant to be a laugh a minute I assume, it was the constant smugness and the "we are right they are wrong" attitude that forced me out. I wasn't actually forced out, I just didn't go back. The party itself was stuffed full of well meaning kids who had a genuine interest in the world but was ruled by some seriously egomaniacal types. And only their brand of Socialism was right. I attended a number of Anti-War rally's, Trade Union protests and open meetings were members of other Socialist groups were present. You remember that scene from THE LIFE OF BRIAN? "Are you the Judean People's Front? Fuck off! What? Judean People's Front. We're the People's Front of Judea! Judean People's Front. Cawk. Wankers." Well that's what they were like. It was like arguing that your shit was better than someone else's shit. Bored me all the way to my local Gap shop.....
  2. Photography. I tried photography for a while too. I bought a really sweet camera, bought about 15 books, took a night class (which I didn't complete), spent a fortune on gadgets, lenses, filters, paper, chemicals, changing bags, tripod, and all sorts of crap that is now in the loft. The camera itself is in a river in a jungle in Thailand. I don't want to talk about it. I was a really really bad photographer. I mean terrible. My fingers were the star's of many of my shots. If anything came out well it was by accident rather than design. Photography cost me a fortune. I got out of it before I sold the couch for film.....
  3. Being Married. Not strictly speaking my fault, well not entirely my fault. I gave it a go for a couple of years but it wasn't for me. Clearly being married to me wasn't for her either. In the years after our divorce I asked her why she got fed up with me and the first thing she said was, "I hated that you never learnt to drive."
  4. Learning to drive. HOW BORING IS THAT! Oh my God it's just so dull! My driving instructor clearly agreed as we spent most of my lessons playing the role of South Park characters. Seriously, that made it bearable but not enough for me to keep doing it. And it was costing a fortune to go for a drive pretending to be Cartman. Cars and driving have never interested me but I took lessons because that's what adults are meant to do. For that reason alone it had to go...
  5. Going off the fags. The last time I tried to stop smoking I lasted 6 hours. Those were the worst six hours of my life, and Little Miss Manuel's life, and the kids that called to my house collecting money for charity. I got the patches, the pretend plastic jobbie, the books, the minging chewing gum, all the crap one has to get to go off the smokes. Awful. Not doing that again in a hurry...
  6. Badge Making. I bought a badge making machine thingy a few years ago. I made badges from when I got up until I went to bed. Then one day I just stopped. I just stopped making badges. I never made a badge again. I can barely even look at a badge anymore. So many memories, so many tears......
  7. Going to the gym. Who the hell was I kidding? I bought membership, bought the gear, bought water, so much water, bought a gym bag, God I even bought wristbands. Oh the horror! I went for about 4 weeks. Then I started to find excuses not to go. I knew LMM would give up mithering me to go in the end. It was just too hard and cutting into my sitting time. I love a good sit........
  8. The Waiter, Can You Wait?. You are going to have to. Oh yes it's over. Far too much like hard work. Was going to write one last episode where they all got killed in a bus crash but couldn't be bothered. Meh what you gonna do?

This list was supposed to have ten entries but you guessed it I just couldn't be bothe..............