Well Done Fillet

Well Done Fillet

Waiter Stuff

What's he building in there?

Manuel is busy,
busy doing man things...

Spent two bloody hours yesterday chasing up deposits for Christmas bookings. It's going to be a busy one. Oh sweet Jesus it's gonna be tough. The bookings are coming in quicker than my fat stubby fingers can cope with. I asked the Glorious Leader for a secretary, he told me to quit whining and get on with it.

People come up with some tremendous excuses for not having their deposits in on time, "I was on my way when I got side tracked in town and then I ran into a friend who I hadn't seen in ages and we ended up going for a drink and that was Thursday and I wasn't in town on Friday as I don't work Friday's as I'm on a job share with Maggie she works on a Friday not me so that's why I didn't get down last week." Said the far too jolly by half secretary who didn't appear to breathe as she spoke to me. To which I replied in my driest most monotone voice, "Yeah, so will you be bringing it this week then?"

Then you get the panicky apologists, "Oh my God, I'm so so sorry. I can't believe I forgot about that. Are we going to lose our table? I'm so sorry. You must think I'm awful. I really am so sorry...." You can hear them searching round their desks for the cash or a stress ball or the Prozac/Valium. I like them panicky. You know they are going to arrive on time and have all their cash sorted in advance and be good little customers. And that's what I need, good little customers who do what they are told.

Christmas isn't about the quality service and all that, it's about as close as you can get to working in a factory without actually having to. It's also about surviving. Christmas past is full of the weak and the dead who never made it past the first weekend. I promised myself no tears, they weren't strong enough to cope with 5 sittings, I don't need to feel bad. You can expect to hear more and more about Christmas over the next few months. It becomes all embracing from now on in. New girl 1 asked the Princess and I what all the fuss was about Christmas and why were we always talking about it. She was quick to understand the brevity of the 4 weeks of December when we simply replied "Cash, lots and lots of cash." Young un's they catch on quick.

Anyway I'm up to my neck in it this week with Christmas stuff and the top secret "Operation NOT ENOUGH HOURS IN THE DAY FOR THIS CRAP BUT I'M GONNA DO IT ANYWAY." More on that to follow. Posting may be light for a day or so, it might not be either, who can possibly say? Oh and if you haven't booked your office's Christmas party yet, get it done soon or it will be Pizza Hut's all you can eat buffet. MMMMMM festive.

I leave you with the Tom Wait's classic "What's he building in there?" or if you prefer, the live version.